I started 2015 getting that terrible chemo combo. I had no hair, no energy and was no longer able to work. I had that terribly painful tumor ablation that didn’t actually work apparently but which allowed me to get genetic testing and find chemo that did work. My husband and I made the decision on a whim to move. We bought a new condo and as of this week sold our house.  So many changes.

I don’t do New Years Resolutions. I don’t even know what to hope for in 2016. I am in a good place right now, mostly. I am getting stronger and hopefully will keep getting healthier. My family is all ups and downs, you know, normal life. 🙂  I have a whole new group of strong supportive people in my life from the gym, not all friends yet, but nice acquaintances and people I can laugh with. Laughter is as important as lunges.

Today I am happy to say that my new sleeping pill allowed me to get some sleep. I still woke up every three hours but at least I was able to fall back asleep! Unfortunately I am so so dizzy now! It feels like I am living on a house boat. I hope it wears off as the meds clear my system. I have absolutely no plans for today. Well, I am hoping to take a shower, and make my bed. I guess those are plans.

I hope for 2016 my family and friends are happy and healthy and filled with the joy of life.

Happy New Year!
Happy New Year!

I think if Christian Slater were here he would wish you all many joys.



This week!

Last night, for the first time in at least a week I got some quality sleep. From about 1 to 9 (yes, I said 9!!) I only woke up a couple of times. I really needed that.

This week will be filled with running around and getting ready for the first Christmas dinner at my house. My sister has done a wonderful job of doing Christmas dinner for a couple of decades so this year I demanded it. She however will cook for the carnivores!

Today I will meet an old friend for coffee and go to Costco and buy our condo a Christmas present of replacing our slider with a brand new Garden View French door. Well, I will sign the contract and pay for half. About six weeks to have it made and install. It’s a nice plain door even though my heart calls for something fancy. My view and lack of windows calls for as much clear glass as possible. I will also run to our old house and pick up a table that we were going to throw out buy which I think I need for Christmas dinner – sit down dinner for 10 doesn’t fit on my tiny little IKEA table.

Tomorrow – Trip to IKEA for a few wine glasses, some Christmas dinner side dishes – my daughter and husbands favorite – and maybe a stack of festive napkins or towels to use for placemats, or bread warming towels. Plus I realized we actually don’t have enough forks! I have thought about tossing all of our hodgepodge, and buying matching silverwear for 10 but I don’t know. I don’t mind everyone having different types, I think it’s kind of fitting to us.

Wednesday – Grocery shop for dinner. I have been picking up things everytime we’re in a store but I need one more PUSH.

Thursday – Start actual dinner prep and clean house.

Friday – Family!

I took my last antibiotic yesterday so I would like to start working out again this week. The drugs definitely made a difference. I am still coughing but I am breathing better and when I could it is not quite so disgusting. My stress is going to be that my doctor said it’s important that I pay attention and if at the end of the week I think there is still infection call and get a second round of antibiotics. If it was as big and ugly as he thinks one week may not be enough. So, I am going to be all paranoid trying to figure this out because it’s important. I don’t want to take more antibiotics that I need but I don’t want the infection to just hang out there and in three weeks when they do a CT scan have them think it’s actually cancer and not infection.I sure do with there was a better way.

Allright, I guess I will get out of bed now!




I am a big whiner but….

I learned something from my husband last night.

Let me start with the whining.

This has really not been one of my better weeks. Aside from really not feeling terribly perky I am not sleeping well, and there has been some additional stress with the whole – OMG you have a giant new tumor that grew in three months to larger than your three year tumor was, and then adding in the Plague killing antibiotic. Last night I went to work out and for the FIRST TIME EVER I had to quit a workout at the halfway mark – really it was the 37 minute mark, but I’m not bragging.  Then to add insult to injury driving home from my failed workout I realized that I hadn’t eaten anything but a few mini donuts and a low-calorie boost drink all day! DUH!!! No sleep, no food, disease and drugs…you can’t work out that way. I am on an official rest till I am done with the antibiotics.

So I got home and started bitching and whining at my husband and son and then telling them that on top of that someone who barely knows me did something nice for me, 2nd time in the day that happened – more on that when I can give you pictures  – which always leaves me flustered. I never know why, I don’t mind attention, I mean for goodness sakes I have been blogging every detail of my life for the last three years. And then my husband said something to my son that explains so many things about me and my attitudes and my life. He said “Your mom hates people feeling sorry for her”. OH MY GOD! I do!! I really really do!  I had never put it in those words in my head and it just makes everything so much easier to understand!!! I love presents, unless you might be giving them to me because I think you might be feeling sorry for me. I am a LOON! Thank you to my husband for clearing up a forty year mystery for me. 🙂

That is all. Go about your day.