A royal flush!

Well yesterday was chemo day. They gave me extra fluids so basically I spent all afternoon peeing. I went out for dinner with my sister afterwards, so that was nice, and it also gave me the inability to workout which was probably good for my steroided hips.

This morning woke up – drank some coffee, hung out in bed for a couple of house watching Shawn T rap up his Diet show, then I got up and looked in the mirror and did a little gasp. It’s been a long time since I’ve seen the Steroid Flush but you recognize it pretty quick. My face is bright red and puffy! I took advantage of this and hopped on the treadmill for my daily walk/run/drag and actually was able to up my speed a little, so bonus there. Today will be lots and lots of water to flush out the chemo and the steroids, and lots of protein and L-glutamine to hopefully keep everything happy.

I think the steroid shots have shrunk my hips. No really. I think they may have been quite swollen. My pants fit differently now. The downside is that my thighs look bigger! They have always been the biggest part of me, runs in the female side of the family. Not much you can do with genetics except lipo, and I just can’t stand the thought of parting with that much money. πŸ™‚

I’ve got the laundry in, and I’m showered and dressed. I think I will do a quick floor sweep and kitchen clean and then I am done in the house. If I stay feeling good I will go work out at four. My lungs are not happy today AT ALL. I assume that’s got to do with the water retention. I also woke up with a bloody nose again.

When my husband left for work today he kissed me on the forehead and told me to take it easy on my body today. It made me laugh. I have had two days of taking it easy. The people who love me are always telling me to slow down. I hope it never happens. There is something that happened to my brain back in 2011 when I was first diagnosed with cancer. It woke me up to the fact that I am not immortal as I once hoped I was. When I had to hear those words again in 2014 it was all of the gates opening up for me. There is no time for wasting. If I want to be strong and healthy, I need to do it now. Period. If I want to read ALL OF THE BOOKS, I must do it now. Time to sit and play with the cat? YUP! NOW. Β Now is not the time to slow down. Some day that choice might be taken away from me, but until then, stay out of my way. πŸ™‚

Okay – enough of my steroid crazy talkings!

Let’s find a random picture to add.






It’s been a long time since I have blogged from bed. It’s because I sleep so late that I have to get up fast! πŸ™‚

This morning I woke up with a headache very early. I am wondering if it is my night time snack of pretzel sticks? So much salt and I am prone to dehydration. Β πŸ™

I would like to share a picture with you.


You know what that yellow line is right? CRACKED IT! I have never broken a phone screen and these are supposed to be unbreakable. It slid 11 inches off of the couch onto my vinyl floors and bam. So that’s what I am doing this morning. πŸ™

I have an appointment at 1 with the orthopedist to see what we can do about my sore hips. Bursitis. uhg. πŸ™

I made a 2nd cup of coffee this morning which is 1 more than I have been having lately and as I moved my cup I noticed this wonderful shadow on my arm. Muscle. πŸ™‚

I am so close. If I could just get a handle on all these physical things. My poor fingers are so sore. I want the pulmonologistΒ (next week) to explain to me why I can have such good blood/oxygen numbers but still not be able to breathe! It’s so frustrating when I am working out. Cardio is 80% of what you need to do in this kind of workout when you are starting and I just can’t do as much as I need to. πŸ™

Yesterday I went to the harder workout. I survived. I now have some more options with the times I work out . And available parking spaces. πŸ™‚

There is no laughing and yelling in the 4:00 pm workout though. I don’t know why! πŸ™

Well coffee and tylenol should be coursing through now. Time to GET UP! Β πŸ™‚




Jumble & Word Search

My mind is so full of only myself these days that I have trouble focusing on anything else. I’m not complaining, or doing some sort of excuse for being selfish, I am just so busy balancing all of the things, medicines, and appointments and pains and finding options for getting stronger or staying healthy, that it’s almost all of I have the space for.

I start thinking about something nice and esoteric and then I accidentally bump one of my poor cracked fingertips on something and I am back to the pain and finding solutions. I am currently in a good eating part of my bodies ups and downs so I am very happy about that. For the last year I have been doing a liquid breakfast. Usually some sort of meal replacement bottle that I can buy at the grocery store. I just can’t eat in the mornings, and by morning I mean the first three hours. So I finally went and found a nice healthy organic version of a meal replacement that I can pop onto my ninja with water or almond milk and ice. It’s not exactly a flavor I crave but it’s tolerable and it’s full of nutrition. I also found some vitamin/supplement type capsules that I can tolerate a couple of months ago so I have been trying to make sure I take those daily. What a difference getting nutrition can make.

I’m also constantly thinking about my poor lungs. I am on round three of antibiotics. I exercise hard. I really do. Sweat pouring down, giving it everything I have hard. My muscles are getting so much stronger but I don’t think I will ever get my cardio back. I like being strong, but dislike always being out of breath. I wonder if maybe the pulmonologist can help me with that. Β I will not be doing side crunches again for a very very long time! They Β worked my upper back muscles so now it hurts when I breathe. We just cannot ever have that. It completely freaks me out. I wake up thinking I can’t breathe. No.

I was actually thinking about skipping tonight’s workout and hitting a yoga session. It’s been a year. πŸ™

I meet more and more people at the gym that make me smile. It is such a weird bonding experience. I wonder how I would have been different if I had a positive experience like this available every day, twenty years ago. Little changes can have such a resounding impact.

I sweat like a freaking fountain when I work out and now my hair is just long enough that when it is dripping sweat it starts curling all over the place. Makes me laugh.

I haven’t been able to contact the physical therapy place to try the infrared treatments. How weird is that? I must just have really bad timing. I have NO doctor appointments this week. I will make up for it by having chemo and then four different doctors in the ten days after.

Okay. Off to the shower then breakfast.



More Nonsensical Typing

Going to try this for my arms and fingers:


I can find absolutely no actual evidence that it works, in fact every objective study I can find says it doesn’t. But, eh. I met a woman last night at my sisters fundraiser who is a physical therapist and works on hands. She and I were talking about this. I know it’s also widely used by certain massage therapists. The PT works close to me and said I can schedule an appointment to try it as an ala carte service, with no insurance or referral and it would only cost me $15.00. I think I will try it on one arm and hand and be my own trial.

I am starting to feel much better than I did. I don’t know why that last chemo hit me so very hard but I was mighty miserable. It did cross my mind that when I stopped drinking vodka I started feeling really bad and yesterday I went back on the vodka and made up for at least a couple of days of not drinking and today I feel much better. Hmmm. I also understand how people get addicted to pills. I have such an arsenal of medication at my disposal now that it’s hard not to just grab a pill. One to make me peppy, one to make me numb (literally, not psychologically) one to make me sleep.

I am back on the anti-biotics for another round. πŸ™ I am also getting yet another doctor. My oncologist wants me to see a pulmonologist Β (spell check wants me to change that paleontologist)Β . I refused a couple of years ago when my beloved GP suggested it, but I guess it’s time. Yay.

Corey is positive what I really need is an oxygen tank. Oh that Corey.

I had stories to tell you but somehow I have forgotten everything I had to say. So I guess I will leave you and go figure out how to make ringtones with iTunes instead. πŸ™‚