Nope – Not me, Not yet..

Had a rough night. For some reason I had a bunch of things flare up when I went to bed. Neuropathy, itchy arms, coughing, stuffy sinuses all BAM. Which of course tells me everything is somehow related. Wish I could figure it out.  Nothing I tried helped. Today I feel better except the neuroathy is very bad. I just took more meds so I am hoping by the time I am done typing it will stop hurting my fingertips. 🙂

Also hurt myself working out last night! I was doing side plank with my feet on a step and as soon as I went up I twisted and fell and I have pulled or bruised something on my rib. Silly.

BUT that’s not why I’ve called you all here. This morning Tami shared a link to a blog on Facebook. It was about a family. Mom, dad and baby I think. And the Mom has some type of cancer. I don’t know much, just read this one entry about how they had decided no more chemo because the chemo they just did after surgery didn’t help and her cancer was progressing aggressively.  I would no more tell someone that their decision is wrong to stop chemo than I would go ahead and smack the people who tell me I should stop chemo. You know, just for awhile to let the side effects clear up. Yes, people do tell me that. Regardless of what or how they say it this is what I hear. “Your chemo may be saving your life but your side effects are inconvenient so go ahead and stop now. You probably won’t die but I am willing to take that chance.” I understand that this is probably not what they mean, but it’s what I hear.

When I read the blog this morning my first thought was OH NO! This woman had chemo for five months and then they checked her cancer. This is pretty standard protocol for someone who has just been diagnosed and they are trying standard treatment. My inside wants to just scream out at them – CALL ANOTHER DOCTOR! Don’t give up yet. You have a beautiful family. 🙁 But like I said, I don’t know the whole story. Maybe this isn’t really what’s going on. This line of thought led me to another. In the small part of the blog that I read God and religion is discussed a lot. It made me wonder…yes, this is finally the reason I started typing this blog…do people who have strong beliefs in God and Heaven and an afterlife give up on treatment faster? When it starts getting difficult is it easier for them to say it’s okay there is something better waiting for me, or my spouse, or my child, on the other side?

Oddly last night I had a dream that involved ghosts and one of the times I woke up I suddenly thought, oh that proves it! There is an afterlife. I wish I could remember more.




6 thoughts on “Nope – Not me, Not yet..

  1. I wonder that too. Those that have that strong belief that believe that they know what their God wants them to do so instead of fighting they go the Gods Will route…and perhaps don’t trust anything else once their mind is set on that trajectory!

    1. I don’t believe I have the right to decide that anyone has to stay alive, or to die, but it does make me sad. I think of all the joys they might miss. I mean what if tomorrow they could get the best cup of coffee they have ever had in their entire life? Or suddenly have a puppy start wiggling by them?

  2. I would not send my worst enemy to cancer treatments centers of America. It is all about numbers for them. If you seem like you will be hard to save, they send you home because you will wreck their numbers. They only take patients they are certain they can save, they send the rest home.

  3. I was reading about how hospitals can rig their numbers. That is why university hospitals often seem like they have bad rates because they take everyone but that place looks over a case and sends them away if they can’t make them better. And they advertise all the time and they make it look like they are wonderful and caring.

Don’t leave without saying something!

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.