Not everyones cup of tea

I was curious about how the radiologist knew from my CT Scan that I had emphysema instead of asthma. So I googled!  The images you see below are not from Google, they are my actual CTs. Apparently with emphysema you get inflamed sections that create little pockets of air that cannot be exhaled.

This first one shows what I think are my little pockets of air  – circled in green. I think some of the other larger white spots may also be trapped air. The purple circles are not quite so innocuous. Those are my tumors. I’ve heard other people talk about naming their tumors. I will not be doing that. I hope they won’t be around long enough for me to decide that it is a good idea to give them that kind of personality or power.




On this one you can also see my lung nodule – circled in red. That is the one that at first they thought was cancer but the general consensus now seems to be that it’s just a weird nodule. Not a big surprise that someone would not be the norm on me or in me.




It’s been weird having this space of time not really doing anything but taking care of business before I start treatment. Last time everything happened so fast.  So far no one has been able to find any clinical trials for me so that’s kind of a bummer. I have read them until my eyes blur but no one wants me. Everyone is very busy trying to cure cervical cancer with HPV positive patients, and a lot of Head & Neck cancers. I wonder if those are mostly smoking related?

I will have to get a port implanted again, my veins are trashed and no one wants chemo in trashed veins. That was very painful for a couple of days so expect a cranky post or two when that happens.

What do you think is your worst personality trait? I have been pondering the concept of being honest with ones self versus never really seeing your own faults today. You know honesty in speech is very important to me. I try not to say insincere things and that can occasionally make me seem impolite or downright mean if I am forced to be in a room with people I don’t actually like. But if I say to you “how are you?” I actually am asking and listening to your answer.




8 thoughts on “Not everyones cup of tea

  1. Do they have any idea how long you have had them? I think you said the tumors aren’t related to your breathing difficulties? So how are they treating your emphysema? Is it helping?

    My worst personality trait? There are so many – it makes it hard to choose. I think if I recognize it, I am honest to myself about it but I am a bit of dullard so I may not see something as others may see it. I like when people are honest, too, but I know some people are very skilled that they can be honest yet still avoid the answering the question. That is hard for me once I catch up and realize they have done that. I would rather people be frank with me than for me to try to figure out what they are saying.

    I’m going to think about the worst personality traits and get back to you.

    You were tired and cranky last night. Do you feel any better today?

    1. No they don’t know how long. I had a PET scan when my rib was biopsied, I think that was late 2012 ( I don’t have my big book of dates with me) and nothing showed then so they were too small to pick up or the the little cancer cells floating around had settled on a place yet. Since it is from the original cancer in2011 we know they were somewhere just to small to see.
      The new inhaler is working very nicely thanks!

    2. Now I am on a keyboard, so much easier!
      I am still cranky and tired. I don’t know why but I can just feel the tension in the back of my neck.
      I do not think you are a dullard – though it is a great word – you are so smart. You have knowledge, and you know how to use it.

  2. Maybe this would be the right time for a massage?

    It is a good word, isn’t it? Actually, I am a bit slow when it comes to picking up on things so in my mind, I am a bit dull. That is okay. I would consider your mind razor sharp and I know other people who are much quicker than I am.

    I am not sure if there is one word for this but I lack follow through. I am an ideas person and I need a follow through person and in some ways that is Craig. There are many important things in life that a person has to do for on their own.

    Oh, the biggie – zero self discipline.

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