Things I didn’t get to say.

I have a friend who suffered a loss this week. Not a close enough friend that we talked about it, but close enough that it was mentioned. You could tell that my friend needed to talk about it. I felt bad that the circumstances didn’t allow me to just stop and let her talk.

I wish I could convey to people how much better grief is when you are able to laugh with it. My sister and I are horrible and inappropriate people who take very little too seriously. Life is fleeting and we both know that things can change in an instant. We also both know that your brain pops up with all sort of bizarre thoughts and feelings when you’re dealing with tough situations. Because we think alike about these things we are able to relax around each other and let the bizarreness of the situation wash over us and just be us. Everyone should have someone that they can be themselves with during stressful times. It makes things so much easier.

I was thinking about how sometimes people will tell you how to grieve, and sometimes they will tell you how to feel. Don’t think about this, always remember that, look at the bright side (no, no one really says that one!)  I always want to stop those people and say no! Just let them feel what they feel, let them say whatever pops into their head. Our job is just to support.

Sometimes grief is not about the person that is no longer there but is instead about the things that you always hoped might happen but now never will.

I googled “Grief” and images and found some interesting pictures. I think this is beautiful and really pretty apt at showing what it can feel like it.


919px-Bertram_Mackennal_-_Grief

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1 thought on “Things I didn’t get to say.

  1. You hit the nail on the head with this. “Sometimes grief is not about the person that is no longer there but is instead about the things that you always hoped might happen but now never will.”

    I envy you and Erin. A lot of sisters don’t have the type of relationship that you two have. Or don’t have sisters. I am glad that you have each other.

    I think you two are right – you have to find some way to relieve the stress of it all.

    I am sorry for your friend. It is a hard place to be.

Thoughts?